If your health isn’t a priority for you now, there will come a day, probably not of your choosing, when it will be and the costs in timing and expense will not be convenient.

That’s my story in a nutshell.  I took reasonably good care of myself, ate relatively well, but ignored some of the “engine noises.”  Then came the wake-up call.  It involved major surgery and the possibility for more surgery was as they said, “significant.”  That’s when I decided to take a stand.

I don’t know about you, but my attitude toward gyms is that they are a necessary evil.  I liked the results, but would prefer to be most anywhere else.  I also labored most of my adult life under the philosophy that to be healthy I had to go to a gym at least three times a week and do 30 minutes of heart-pounding aerobic exercise.

About the time I took my stand, a friend referred me to a non-profit that needed a volunteer to teach a wellness program.  I thought “perfect!”   When I met with them, I discovered that their program was based upon new research that was completely different from the gym regimen.

I signed on.  I began working the program and led one class.  My results have been phenomenal.  I’ve worked the program for four years and have lost over 80 pounds. The doctor just smiles now and says, “Keep doing what you’re doing.”

I became so passionate about the program, I partnered with the non-profit to bring it to a larger audience and have since led several thousand participants through the program.  Their results have been impressive.

The basic philosophy of the program is this:

• 30 minutes of moderately intense physical activity accumulated throughout the day on most days of the week

• Eat a well-balanced diet low in sugar and saturated fats.

• Couple your goals with lifestyle skills (goal setting, overcoming barriers, enlisting support, etc) to create lasting changes rather than an intervention (like most diets and exercise programs).

There are a number of operative words above that really distinguish this program from others and I’ll write more specifically about them on the next post, but the essence is this: 

Being active, doing the things you love to do and eating well, with foods that you enjoy.  And small steps lead to big results.

Starting and growing a business parallels child rearing. 

As an infant, the business is totally dependent upon you for support, both emotionally and physically.  As a young child and pre-teen (the blessed years), dependency wanes a little.  You both develop a rhythm and begin to enjoy each other on a different level.   

The teenage years are tumultuous and rebellious as the business wants to throw off what it now deems as shackles and create its own identity.  This is usually a make-it-or-break-it time for most entrepreneurs. 

And finally, in adulthood you learn to let go and begin relating to your business as an individual with a separate identity.  Hopefully the relationship is one of mutual respect.

This process can take months or years.  It’s been my experience that stable profitability occurs in adulthood.

So start the process early.  Get a dba (doing business as) from your county courthouse or even better, file for an LLC (Limited Liability Company) or an “S” Corporation.  

The latter two give you extra protection from potential liabilities.  Costs are nominal.  In my state the dba is $16 and you can submit an LLC or “S” Corporation filing yourself for under $400.  That’s low enough to get you started, but as soon as you can afford it I would have an attorney review your filing.

Lastly, get a separate checking account and start keeping a set of books using Quicken, Quickbooks, Mint (which is too cool) or some other easy-to-use computer program.  I’ve never really been a proponent of business cards, but some feel that it adds legitimacy to their work.  

You don’t need to spend a lot of money to get started.  The important thing is that you begin to treat your business like a business.

The Beatles sang "I get by with a little help from my friends."  The reality of my world is that I get by with a whole lot of help from my friends. 

Relying upon others, though, doesn’t come naturally to me.  I've had to work on it.  I find it much easier to give support than to receive it.  What I have learned in my life and through coaching many is that support is essential to our success and quality of life.

Support comes in many forms and the 1st Step is to determine the types of support you want:

• Partnering – actively participates with you in making the changes you want.  (Example: workout partner, biz building partner)

• Listening – listens without giving advice or trying to solve your problems

• Experiential - someone who has gone through what you are going through and is willing to share their wisdom and insights.

• Professional – provides expertise, technical information or training

• Cheerleading – lifts you up and roots you on

• Accountability – holds you to your commitments

• Emotional – empathizes with the range of emotions that often occurs when making changes

• Logistical – handles practical details to make your life easier

We often  need several types of support at any given time.  The types of support, the level in which it’s needed and the length of time needed will vary.  It’s a fluid process and much like growing a garden – one that requires attention.

The 2nd step is to identify who can best provide the exact type of support you need. Rarely can one person meet all of your support needs.

Once you've made your list, the all important 3rd Step is to ask for the support you want.  This can be intimidating so here's language that I find makes it easier:

1. Ask permission and redirect...
   "Can we talk just a minute about something that's important to me?"
   
   
2. Enroll them in what you're wanting to do...
   "As you know, I've made a commitment to..."
   "I've been working hard to..."
   
   
3. Make a specific request...
   "I could use your help.  Would you be willing to..."
   
   
4. Thank them and tell them what they mean to you...
   "You've made a big difference in my life and I want to thank you for listening..."
   "I value your information and want to thank you for..."
   
   
5. Be gracious - whether the answer is yes or no...
     "I perfectly understand.  I'm so glad you are in my life..."

Support - much needed and yet often over-looked.  It's a skill to be developed, but once mastered (don't worry, it's often messy) will bring a richness to your life. 

This is an important secret I learned early.  You don't have to know how you're going to create the life you want, you just have to know why you want it and it has to come from the heart.

Knowing your “Why,” your motivating reason is essential to your success.   It will keep you going when times get tough; help you hang in there when you start to doubt.

I know several men that are Internet successes and they have mastered this one well.  Each has his own personal reason that has led to his success.  For one it’s his family, another grew up poor, for several it’s just about winning.  They play by the game, “He who dies with the most toys – wins.”  

In working with many women entrepreneurs I’ve found that they feel the toys are nice, but not a big enough reason.  Sure they like nice things, but there are other things that are as important if not more so – family, quality of life, balance, relationships, and giving back.  Why, they want it all and why not!

When I first started in business I had a younger teenage brother to support so my "Why" was about family and survival. 

As I grew and changed, my business grew and changed and my "Why" evolved.

So today my "Why" is having:

• the Security of having no debt and knowing there are plenty of funds available
• a System to generate more than enough revenue to cover my expenses each month whether I work or not
• the Satisfaction of looking in the mirror and saying, “Yes!" with humility.
• to Show my son that you can do anything you want if your heart is in it
• the Space to do pretty much what I want; when and where I want
• the Self-expression to use my talents and gifts for a higher good

Here are 5 steps to help you connect with your “Why:"

1. Space – Find a quiet space that nourishes you and one in which you won’t be disturbed.  Set aside some time, but don’t time yourself.
2. Vision – Begin with the end in mind.  Think about how you want to have lived your life.  How do you want to be remembered?  What do you have a burning desire to do, to be?  What’s most important to you?
3. Commit – Write your vision – on a piece of paper, in a journal, type it, draw it on a poster. Find a way that suits you best.  The medium doesn’t matter; what matters is that you take this step.
4. Align – Align your actions so that you’re on purpose. Work only within your gifts and talents.  Use your “Why” during the day to keep you directed.
5. Connect - Spend a few minutes each morning with it visualizing, reading, praying, or meditating on your “Why.” Again, it’s what works best for you. At the end of your work day, take a moment and ask, “What could I have done differently to help bring this into reality.”  Adjust as you feel compelled – in your actions and even in your “Why.”

These steps are just a few small changes in your routine that can produce huge results in your life and business.  

I'd like to here from you as to what you've discovered and to the progress you're making.  Please post a comment on my blog, email me, or post in Facebook. 

Directions… Something guys shy away from, but yet simple instructions can provide much comfort.  What I have learned from coaching many women entrepreneurs is that seeking advice and support is essential to success.

Recent research as reported by The Women’s Business Council has shown that successful women focus on building relationships, are more likely to request and rely upon support, and place personal values above business practices.

My essential success strategy:

    Build a Trusted Team of Confidantes, Coaches, and Advisors.

My inner circle consists of my business coach, my legal and financial advisor, and four close friends.  All serve as confidantes and advisors for my life and businesses.  Some are compensated financially; others are not.  What’s common to this group is that they want the best for me, are unconditionally constructive, and will tell me the truth in a way that supports me.

The next group is really more of an informal group and consists of several coaches, advisors, consultants, mentors, and teachers.  I continually look for people that can assist me in growing and strengthening particular aspects of my business.

Another resource that can be very valuable and affordable at the same time is to participate in a gender specific group.  Women do this very well and the groups are much more readily available.  I had the good fortune recently to participate in a men's group and found it to be powerful and transformative.

Take your time and look for those with whom you share common values and can trust.  Remember, you are your most important asset.  Invest in yourself by surrounding yourself with talented people to support and advise you.  You’re worth it!

Back to Directions…

Here are three simple strategies that will propel you in the right direction:

1. Be up to something bigger than yourself - It's not about you, it's the difference you make in peoples'   lives.

2. Take great care of yourself - Support is just one way.  We'll explore others in subsequent posts.

3. Clear the clutter - You're not going anywhere if you have a lot of stuff dragging you down and holding you back.